Human Emotions
by Yaoifan101
Summary: Jacob won't show pain. Especially infront of Edward but when his pain becomes to much for him. Guess who's there to see him break down? Edward/Jacob Yaoi


There was an old phrase, 'sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me.'

Well as a werewolf not many things could hurt Jacob, and for Jacob the phrase was the exact opposite.

'Sticks and stones can never break my bones but words will always hurt me.'

And they always did. When he had become a werewolf he learned that others didn't take kindly to people who are different. And others didn't take kindly to his race either. That being the vampires of course.

Ever since he had clashed with those leeches he'd been referred to by many titles. Such as mutt, dog, mongrel, fido.

All of them had hurt him just as much as sticks and stones would have if he was human.

But Jacob would never show any sign of the pain it made him feel when they said those things to him. He would cover it up with anger.

Because no matter what..Jacob would never show how much it really hurt.

He would never let them know, he would never show any sign it effected him like that. Or at all sometimes.

And above all..he would never let Edward know.

Edward was his enemy. He was his enemy for being a vampire. He was his enemy for winning over Bella.

He was even his enemy before he even became a vampire! So of course Jacob couldn't let his sworn enemy know that he hurt him when he insulted him.

Jacob didn't understand how emotions could cause someone so much pain. Jacob found himself laying in bed feeling nothing but pain.

And not just the aching in his jaw. He felt it at the pit of his stomach..in his chest. Making his chest feel like it was constricting.

His stomach felt like it was sinking, it was the kind of unbearable pain that wouldn't go away. The kind where you wanted to try and tear out your stomach because it wouldn't go away.

He just laid there sprawled out on his bed, with his arms stretched out and his legs as well.

He just stared at the ceiling of the darkened room. His throat felt like it was getting tighter making the back of it hurt. A prickling pain spreading through his hands to the ends of his fingertips.

The kind of prickling when it felt like someone was poking you with needles. His mouth was dry and his body felt like it was on fire.

Yet it felt like at the same time he was a 100 degree's below. Jacob's body was always warm but it never felt like a flame was literally an inch from his skin.

His heart was clenching as if someone was closing their hand around it. His breaths were shallow and it felt hard to breath.

But all Jacob did was lay there, wondering how an emotion could do all this.

The feeling of failure..despair..pain..sorrow..shame..defeat!

Jacob clenched his eyes shut as the last word rang through his head.

Bella had chosen...and had chosen Edward. Jacob found himself not being able to handle the news.

He felt it overflowing...so much so that he couldn't cover it up like he did all the rest. So he had run, he ran home.

And now he laid there, he opened his eyes. Feeling his stomach twist and turn again. He shut them again not being able to decide which hurt more.

The thoughts of the incident...and what Edward said were racing into his mind. Making the pain grow worse inside him so much so that he felt like screaming!

Screaming and just tearing himself apart! He was desperate to get rid of the pain now. All of his pent up agony coming out in bursts.

He couldn't stand it! It was taking every last drop of his control to stop from shrieking. So he did the only thing that made sense now.

He stood up hurriedly and ran out of his room running out onto the front porch. Running like hell was at his heels jumping from the porch and running to the forest.

Running seemed to be the only thing that would work. It was the only thing that came to his mind. To just run..run run run!

He shifted in mid run. Landing on all fours and kept running not even faltering in the mad dash.

The brown wolf's eyes were wide and frantic his ears pressed against his head as he ran. He just needed to get away, far away. The forest was dark and the only lights were the stars and the moon now.

He could feel his legs working so rapidly it seemed like his feet hardly touched the ground. The wind whipping through his fur and leaving what seemed like miles behind him.

Until he finally came to a stop in a small clearing panting heavily. He shifted again. His shirt being torn clean off of him now.

Jacob was on his knee's with his hands in front of him just panting. His eyes wide. How could human emotions cause him to act like this.

How could it control his body like this. Jacob suddenly felt hot tears slide down his face.

/_How can simple words hurt this much?/_

Jacob tried to control the flow of tears as he had done many other times. But now felt his control slipping through his fingers.

This was so pitiful..the pain was starting to come back again. Pounding against him harder then before.

He felt it swell up inside of him until it felt like he was going to burst!

He gripped the dreadful pain in his stomach and screamed.

...

Edward was walking around outside. Since he didn't sleep he grew bored during the night. So he decided to stroll through the woods. He was very pleased with Bella's decision that she made earlier today.

He also hadn't seen any sign of Jacob since then, so this was a pretty good day. He let out a deep sigh taking in the peaceful night air.

He closed his eyes enjoying the silence. When his eyes snapped open.

A loud scream pierced through the silence startling the vampire. He looked around wondering were the noise had come from.

It was without a doubt..the most painful thing he had ever heard. Not just because it sounded like the person was in pain..but it was painful to hear. Curious of where the noise came from Edward began to walk to where the scream came from.

As he walked farther and farther getting closer to where he heard the noise, he began hearing new sounds.

He stopped listening to the noises trying to decipher what they were.

"Sobbing?" he whispered in question. Thats at least what it sounded like he started walking again. He could smell the faint scent of salt...tears in other words.

But no blood.

"Why would someone just randomly be out in the middle of the forest crying?" he asked. "Why would anyone be out here this late anyways?" he asked himself again. The person wasn't bleeding..so why?

He silently peered through the tree's and thats when it hit him.

Werewolf.

...

Jacob didn't know how this pain was going to get worse, he felt like dying. He hated crying he hated feeling so damn helpless. Every time he tried to stop it just got worse.

"Jacob?" a voice asked incredulously from behind him. Jacob widened his eyes at the sound of the vampires voice.

He shut his mouth, this couldn't be happening to him,not now! He tried to regain his composure.

"What the hell are you doing here leech," he asked trying to sound as regular as possible. But to his dismay his voice came out sounding watery.

Edward looked at Jacob since his back was turned to him he couldn't see his face.

"..Are you..crying?" he asked in an almost shocked tone.

"No," Jacob said. Why now did all of his suppressed emotions have to come out now!

"Then turn around," Edward said not believing a lick of it. He stood with his arms crossed waiting for a reply. He blinked when he heard what sounded like a strangled sob. It was obvious Jacob was trying to stop crying.

"Why the hell would I," Jacob asked trying to put some of the edge into his voice.

"Well if your not crying then turn around," Edward said.

"I don't have anything to prove to you damn it!" Jacob replied praying that he would leave. He widened his eyes when he felt a chilling hand grip his arm and spin him around.

And he found himself staring right at Edward. Who suddenly looked genuinely surprised looking down at the younger boy. But he also looked, to Jacob's surprise...concerned. Edward found it strange that he truly was concerned...that wasn't something usual.

He wasn't sure why..but for some reason he was wondering why Jacob was crying. Never in his life had he seen the young wolf act this way. When they fought with each other or argued Jacob was always very..rough and angry.

But now..he looked...feeble and distressed. Jacob was just staring at Edward. He didn't know what to do.

But then he straightened out his face trying to make it seem like he wasn't crying.

"What," he asked. Edward didn't reply he just watched as Jacob tried to pull a straight face, though the tears made it unconvincing.

Jacob felt his shoulders tremble slightly, then felt the rest of his body trembling. His eyes giving way slightly he bit his lip.

Trying to keep himself silent, taking in shaky breaths through his nose. He blinked when his eyes began stinging again.

Edward was just staring at him. Watching the display Jacob was doing. He wondered what could have happened to him to make him act this badly. Why he was so all a sudden concerned about the werewolf..he had no idea.

"Why are you crying?" Edward asked. Jacob bit harder on his lip before letting it go.

"None of your business now let go of me!" he said attempting to glare at him. Jacob wanted so badly to just run to the nearest cliff and jump off it.

Anything to get rid of this pain that was haunting him.

"No..not until you tell me," Edward said firmly his eyes staring at him intensely..a regular human probably would have given in after the first second of that look.

"I don't have..gh..anything to tell you!" Jacob said choking in the middle of his sentence. He was sure that his arm was numb where Edward was holding it, in a vice grip.

"I know your lying, I'm just trying to help you." Edward said. Something Jacob's head snapped at that. Distracting him from his pain for a moment.

/_HELP! How the hell could you help me! Your just making it worse!/ _Jacob's head screamed..god even his thoughts were crying.

Edward widened his eyes at hearing the wolves thought. "How..what have I done?" Edward asked. Again Jacob's head went off..it made his pain worsen that that bastard didn't even know what he did.

/_You've done everything damn it! What have you done! How the hell do you not know!/_

His mind was screaming furiously at him, Jacob hadn't even realized he had started crying again. Knowing the vampire was reading his thoughts, Jacob wanted to control himself from giving it away. Like he did all those other times.

"But I don't know, what did I do to you to make you cry Jacob?" he was really confused.

Jacob stared at him, now Jacob was the one who snapped.

"Jacob!" he asked, his voice was sore but he didn't care now! Edward blinked hearing Jacob talk with his mouth instead of his mind.

"Since when the hell was that what you called me!" he asked his voice getting louder. Edward looked at him. Apparently he'd touched a nerve on that.

"This is happening to me because of you!" tears streaming rapidly down his face. "I can stand all those fights we have, but the fucking mental abuse i have to get from you is more then I can fucking take!" he shouted.

Edward widened his eyes at that outburst.

"The emotional abuse i have to take from you and everyone else day after day, I fucking can't handle it! It's killing me inside!" he almost screamed at him. He was choking again his eyes were stinging like crazy and his throat burned like fire.

But for some reason he couldn't stop. It was like he needed to have him know what he was putting him through.

"My self esteem can't even rebuild itself again! Don't you know what kind of torture you put me through every fucking day!" he asked. "It's not enough to insult me but you have to fucking wave Bella and everything else I don't have in my face!"

"You don't even know what that does to me!" he shouted sobbing in between his screams. "Do you think I enjoy being called a mutt! To have you humiliate me like that!"

"Its your fault that I'm in so much pain all I fucking want is to go jump off a cliff!"

Edward silent...his eyes wide his surprise was unimaginable at hearing Jacob say all of this.

"THAT'S WHAT YOU FUCKING DID TO ME! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!"

"ITS ALWAYS BEEN BECAUSE OF YOU!"

Edward had heard just about enough now, he leaned forward and pressed his lips against Jacob's to cease his screaming.

Jacob's eyes widened as his words were cut off. The vampires mouth successfully stifling the wolf's voice. Jacob shut his eyes when the stinging got to them again, he let out an involuntary whimper against the vampires lips from the burning in his throat now.

Edward hearing the others muffled speech dull to a few whimpers finally pulled back slightly. Hearing the boy begin panting. There was a silence that settled around them for a few moments.

Edward looked down at Jacob, "Is that really what you've been thinking all this time?"

He had always wondered why Jacob's mind had been so unreadable every time they fought. Edward had assumed he was thinking about how much he hated him. But not this.

Jacob didn't want to open his eyes now...not after what he just said. He wouldn't be able to look at Edward after what he just let him hear. Jacob wished that he would just wake up and find this all to be one bad dream.

"Jacob."

Jacob almost winced from hearing the vampire speak. Saying _his_ name..his actual name.

"Your not going to wake up from this...it's real," Edward said silently. Now being able to hear the boys thoughts again.

Hearing that just made Jacob not want to open his eyes even more. How was he suppose to face him now. What was he suppose to do? Just stand there?

Meanwhile Edward carefully listened to what the boy was thinking and watched him. He slowly lifted one hand up, touching the side of the boys face. He felt Jacob immediately flinch pulling away from the touch.

"Calm down," Edward said softly.

Reaching out touching his face once more. Jacob began to slowly open his eyes. Edward stared down at his eyes.

Watching them shimmer through the pools of tears falling from them.

"I don't want to hurt you," he said. Lightly brushing his thumb over his cheek wiping off the trail of tears that had been left there.

Jacob opened his eyes, his eyes not meeting the others face. Yet they looked distressed..but..confused now. Feeling the cold touch brushing over his cheek. And all he could think was.

/_Why?_/

Edward leaned forward again hovering over the others lips slightly.

"Because I don't want to hurt you anymore."

He leaned down pressing his lips against the werewolf's again. This time Jacob felt less compelled to pull away from the touch. His eyes slipped closed again, still feeling his thumb stroking his cheek.

Why did this sensation seem to...lull him almost. Almost like lulling him from his pain,his anger, his confusion.

He could hear himself sob slightly through the kiss.

"Shh," Edward said leaning back from his lips slightly before kissing him again.

This is what he did every time a sob escaped, and he would wipe away whatever tear escaped his eye.

Until Jacob heard himself silence. And Edward leaned back again. Looking down at him again.

"You stopped crying," he noted silently. Jacob blinked noticing he had. His eyes were reddish now and his throat hurt.

He looked at Edward but couldn't find anything to say. What could he say?

Edward looked at him before looking up at the sky seeing that the night was receding slightly. He looked down at the young wolf again.

"The sun will be rising soon...I should go," he said. Almost hesitantly removing his hand from the boys face.

"Goodbye..Jacob."

Jacob watched as Edward walked away. He stared at him and the question on his face remained.

Jacob had gone home then, he laid in his bed and stayed there. Just thinking about what had happened. Watching the sun rise over the tree's, the morning sun glinting through the branches. The pain was gone and Jacob..couldn't be more confused.

Everything seemed to go back to how it had been, as if that night had never happened.

Edward argued and fought with him, and Jacob still didn't show any signs of pain.

And yet every time Jacob cried at night..after the pain got to be to great of a burden for him.

Every time Edward came out to the forest and did the same thing. Held him kissed him soothing his pain. He stayed there comforting him until Jacob stopped crying. And every time Edward left before the sun rose.

And every time Jacob watched him walk away. Confused as ever. Watching him walk and wondering.

How simple human emotions could do all this.

**END**

_**ahhh holy crap i enjoyed writing this...yes i know its kinda weird..well..i don't think so but some people..whatever i just love wriitng hurt/confort fics...i enjoy having hot men cry and hot men comforting them...its my thing well hope you enjoyed it please review**_


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